2013 Taught Me

This time last year I was probably at my local Applebee's in Apple Valley, Minnesota with old friends catching up on our first semesters of college.. and here I am one year later sitting at my condo in Florida answering business emails on my balcony overlooking the ocean with a tasty beverage to the right of me. I don't know if that's clue enough to you that my life has drastically changed this past year. 2013 brought many highs and lows. Through the thick and thin of this year I am blessed with the direction of my life. Over the years it's sort of become a tradition to outline some of the main things I've learned, so here we go. 2013 taught me:

First off, 2013 taught me to have fun. I think this was the first year that I had genuinely had fun with my life instead of dwelling on what wasn't right. I learned to take advantage and make the best out of every situation and location you're in, because life is way too short to not make a good time. I see too many people seem scared of having too much fun. It's like they think a little fun is going to really hurt them in the end. In the end, I personally believe that you're only going to regret the fun you didn't have..

2013 taught me to not be scared of putting yourself out there. I took a leap of faith with social media's this year and it's crazy how it blew up right in my face. I think it's incredible to think hundreds of thousands of people all around the world know who I am.. and that decision to start posting came from me. I hear so many people say, "I'll start making an effort tomorrow." Life doesn't wait for you to capitalize on opportunities. It's awesome to see where a little confidence and persistence took me this year. I'm set up for some crazy things in 2014 and I couldn't be more excited or ready.

2013 taught me to never be anyone's second best. I was in a relationship for almost a year which fell a part about a month ago. Everything changed and what I thought was one of the best relationships of my life turned out to be wrong. I'm not going to sit here and say that it was fine, because it wasn't. I thought it was going to be one of those "forever" type of things.. I was naive enough to think that actually happens these days. It's all good, if it's meant to work out, it will in the future. If not, well, Ariana Grande is single?

2013 taught me to work harder than ever, even if that means taking on more than you can handle and getting less sleep than you deserve. I'm a full-time college student, D1 athlete, intern, hold a part-time job, manage all this Vine/Instagram/Music madness, plus my social life. It's stressful. I go to bed a 3-4 am and get up at 8-9 AM almost every single day. And next semester it doesn't get easier.. See I'm on this "let's try to graduate college in 2 1/2 years so I can finally live my life" deal which forces me to take 21 credits a semester.. 2013 taught me to work hard, play hard I guess?

2013 taught me to go after what you want and to forget about the people who only want to bring you down. I lost the relationship I had for 16-17 years with my parents when I said I wanted to pursue music. They laughed in my face, cut me off, and that was that. I know what I want and I wasn't going to let their opinion stop me from going after what I'm working so hard for in the future. Besides my parents, there will probably be some other decisions I'll be making within the next few years that some people won't agree with.. and that's completely fine. As long as you're all good with the decisions you're making, don't stress about the hate.

This next one is a work in progress.. 2013 opened my eyes to the fact that sometimes you just need to walk away from the things that aren't worth it anymore. I know there are a few things that I'm involved with that I have absolutely no passion for, yet I still participate. It can be hard to make the decision to let time run it's course or make a drastic decision during a bad time. At the beginning of 2014 I'm going to face some huge decisions to make that could potentially change everything. My gut feeling is to walk away.. and I'll probably end up listening to my gut.

But most of all, I think the most important thing I've learned in 2013 is to try and be happy. Cut all the bullshit out of your life, whether that it is people, activities, things, or actual bull shit. Do you and care less about what others think of it. You're going to get judged either way, so why not do you and screw the rest? (Hint: I'm talking about all the people that will try and hold you back, degrade you to their standards, or leave you feeling bad about yourself/your life everyday). As I get older the more I see the beauty in the things all around me. If you take the time to see the things that make you get out of bed in the morning, you'll start to get that life isn't just about working, the daily grind, etc. It's about enjoying the time you have here. Most of us have 70-90 years on this earth, if that. Why spend that short period of time unhappy? It doesn't make sense. LIVE


Until December 2014,


Will Biernat 

2013

When I look back at this year, I see a lot of difference. A year ago I was still afraid to take risks. I was afraid of others opinions and overall perceptions of me. I grew a tremendous amount in 2013, and in ways that the closest people to me don't even know about. I had my successes, failures, loves, heartbreaks, breakthroughs, and tribulations. Overall, I would have to say this year has been one big step in the right direction, and that is the first time I can honestly say that.

A year ago I was still caught up in the past. I was bitter over the way I was treated by my peers in high school and was looking for a way to lash out. I'll be the first to admit, I did it all wrong. I took my anger out on the people closest to me and in the end, it pushed them away. I think the best thing I did in 2013 was to completely eliminate the people that brought me down. There's no point in dwelling on people and relationships that are destined to fail or only make you unhappy in the end.

2013 opened my eyes to fact that if you chase a dream long enough, you can start to see it come true. If you would of told me a year ago today that I would be sparking the interest of record labels, have a fan base, and meet icons in the entertainment industry, I wouldn't believe you. My drive to succeed and capitalize on my opportunities is at an all time high. I'm at the point where I'm not going to be satisfied with anything less than successful, and in 2014, I'm determined to prove that to people.

There's going to be a lot of change in the next few months. Hell, there's already been a lot of change in these past few months alone. Whether it's been my career aspirations or my personal life, everything has taken a complete 360. Having a non-existant close family throughout the past few years has turned me into a completely different person. I've changed. I've learned to vouch for myself, and make ends meet. I guess when I was younger and had everything handed to me on a silver platter, I thought that was going to be my life. I was so wrong. Now that I am completely cut off and on my own, 2013 gave me the biggest reality check. No, not just a reality check, but a life lesson. I came from a town that everyone could get anything with a quick check from Mom and Dad, or in some cases, Grandma or Grandpa. The independence of these past few months has taught me how to work even harder so that one day money won't be a concern. In 2013 I lost a few of my closest friends as well. They changed, I changed, we all changed. 2013 has been a year of change. As I'm at the outro to this year, I don't know where the change is going. It's a weird feeling, because I see myself at a fork in the road. One towards a standard life, and the other towards a big unknown. Well a lot of people would take the road to safety, I'm not that kind of person anymore. My head and heart are yearning for the unknown. And who knows where the unknown could take me.

At the end of this year, I feel free. I don't have anything or anyone holding me back from the things I want to accomplish. I'm ready for the life I think I deserve. Even though I don't have the closest people in my life anymore, it's all good. The more I see everything around me play out the way it does, the more I wonder if things do really happen for a reason. I wonder if the circumstances that we face are just trials and tribulations of something more. Who knows, I'm still figuring that all out.

 A lot of 2013 was eliminating the bad before the good could really sink in. I had the best summer of my life, and I spent the majority of that time with someone I won't ever forget. I have great vibes for 2014.. I really do. I wonder where I'll be a year from now? I wonder if I'll be sitting somewhere typing a new blog in a completely different place talking about the great unknown? Only time will tell.

Until then,


Will Biernat 

Walls

Life is all about perspective.

Whether we see it or not, a lot of the things around us are forced on us by society. 

Take a minute and think: 

Why do you eat cereal for breakfast instead of Steak? 

Why do you wear nice clothes to church?

Why are you wearing North Face instead of the cheaper equivalent?

Why do you have an Apple computer when you could have a Dell?

Societal Norms make me sick. 

I could get on a much deeper level with this right now, but I won't. There are some things that have happened in my life recently that make me disappointed with our society. Individuals that I thought would never stand down, are starting to stand down. And for what? The unknown?  

One thing I will never do is apologize for the the good things in my life. Just because someone else tells me it's not okay, doesn't mean it's not exactly what I need. 

I've been around this track too many times. It all makes me sick. 

Change

I'm going to keep this one short. Because even though I could write for days, I'm sort of numb right now.

Change is something mysterious. I love when change brings me new places, introduces me to new people, etc. On the contrary, I hate when change takes everything away.

I wish I could tell just one person all of the changes that have been happening. It's amazing how everything can be going so great in your life, but when one thing you thought would never happen, happens, you feel like you have nothing.

Maybe it's time for me to reach out for my family again. Maybe it's time to let go. Maybe it's time to forget. Maybe it's time to do what's right for myself.

Maybe it's time for me to change.

Losing

Hey internet. It's 1:30 AM, I have to be up at 7 AM, and I still have to finish a paper that's worth 50% of my final grade. I'm writing this because as I grow older I'm finding myself with less and less people in my life that I consider people I can trust with everything.

Growing up changes people. And I'm not talking about myself, because I've changed a lot too. I'm talking about the people that I always thought would be there. As our circumstances change and big decisions plague who we really want to be, reality sinks in.

.. And sometimes reality hits hard.

If I could take away one thing from growing up, separating myself from my family, and stepping out into a world of unknowns, it's that you have to learn to accept loss and vouch for yourself. There won't be a lot of people out there that truly have your best interest at hand. You always have to be prepared for the people who you cared about the most to walk out of your life. Always be prepared to have days with nothing, and appreciate the days you feel you have everything.

Growing up as an only child, I learned independence at an early age. I've taken so many matters into my own hands, and I have to say that I'm completely blessed I have. Yeah, it's been hard. There have been many nights where I stay wide awake worrying about tomorrow. But at the end of the day, all the experiences that I've had have been worth it.

But as much as I am proud of my independence, I worry that it's only debilitating me in the end. I've let some of the closest and influential people in my life go. I've ended relationships that have had no issues. And yeah, I regret a lot of it. I would be a complete fool to say I didn't.

I don't know how many nights I've stayed up and thought about times from my past, reached to my phone to text the person, and then realized that they wouldn't respond. It wouldn't be the same. Nostalgia sinks in.

Appreciate what you have, because losing what you thought you would never lose.. hurts. It sucks. And shit will never be the same. 

Dedication

Dedication comes from within. Exhibiting dedication isn't just something that comes to you overnight. Whatever it may be, we all find ourselves dedicated to something. Dedication stems from a hunger so strong it consumes us entirely.

What are you dedicated to? You don't know? That's completely fine. Many of us search for years without any indication of what we want to do in our short life here on earth. But when you're out there searching for your passion, when you find it, never let it go. 

Too many people conform to societal norms. If you want to be a doctor, pursue a doctoral education in medicine. If you want to be an actor, do everything possible to make that happen. If you want to be an activist in a foreign country, move. Do it. I can't stand hearing about the passions of people going to waste just to satisfy others superficial opinions of what one should do in their lifetime. 

I come from a family of business executives/owners, doctors, lawyers, etc. With every move I make, I'm expected tag along in their footsteps. But I don't want to be a doctor, lawyer, etc. While I don't exactly know where my life is going, I'm working harder everyday to make something out of myself. Breaking that news to my family wasn't easy. The disappointment that it stimulated will always remain with me in some way or another. My decision to head into the entertainment business cost the relationship with my entire family. Even though I sacrificed my family, I've never been happier with the direction of my life. 

I'm no success story. I go to bed with an immense amount of regret every night. I regret not pursuing my interests earlier. I regret being too afraid to be dedicated to my interests in fear of what people would think. I regret some of the decisions that I've had to make in spite of the direction of my life. But I wouldn't trade anything for the world.

At the end of the day, we're human. We're not here to please anyone. We're here to be happy and make a positive influence. So if that means joining the peace corps, traveling around the world without a dollar to your name, or going to law school, do it. Because following what you're truly dedicated to will never disappoint you. 

Failing to come to terms with your dedication will leave you nothing but lonely. I don't know about you, but I'd rather be happy with little support than dreading each day to conform to someone else's views. 

I hope those who I've disappointed can see this one day and know that your disappointment is being sent down a one way street. Your disappointment in me will not be reciprocated with disappointment in myself.

Cause all I see is an open road to anywhere I want. 

Nostalgia

Nostalgia isn't just something you forget. It's an ever piercing pigment of who you once were and who you are today. During life we find ourselves in an endless cycle of living and remembering. The experiences we live metastasize into who we become in life. It's human tendency to reflect on the good and bad. We see every instance in which we once felt something. Whether that was pure happiness or swallowing sorrow, we remember. 

Nostalgia keeps me up at night. Nostalgia to me is the whisper of the words of my estranged parents. It's the joy of being youthful and not caring about a thing in the world. It's the health of the loved ones that I have lost. It's the hateful words of my peers growing up. 

When I think into the past, I see a hierarchy of events that don't quite fall together. The footprints that I have left thus far don't make sense. I know people from all walks of life around the country. Hell, all over the world. I've had experiences that are so personal that I refuse to talk about them to anyone. The nostalgia of these people and experiences run through my veins. 

It's funny to talk about, but last weekend is the first time I've had a conversation with a complete stranger, let alone anyone at all, about my entire life. I took a half our taxi ride from downtown Chicago to Chicago-Ohare International Airport at 4 AM. Slightly out of it at the time I explained my life down to details I've managed to overlook myself. For that half hour I found myself reminiscing on the good and bad moments of my life. I explained my aspirations. I talked about the relationships I have managed to let go. For that half hour, the nostalgia that has made up my entire life whisked right in front of me. For that half hour, the taxi driver didn't say one word. Finally, we pulled up to the terminal. Expecting him to say nothing I quickly pulled out my Visa to swipe and leave. Instead, he turned off the ignition and put the car in park. He abruptly turned around and looked me in the eyes. He had legitimate tears in his eyes. 

In his best foreign formed English he mumbled,

"Let all of your worry go. The past is the past, it's a part of who you are, not who you are. Life is too short to care about things and people that cannot be changed. Live free and without fear and you will forever be prosperous." 

Nostalgia. The sentimental value I put emphasis on in my past has carried on way too long. If people aren't going to be supportive of my aspirations, I'll let them go. If the closest people in my life are willing to walk out on me for nothing, I'll let them go. Let it all go and move forward. For I will always have the memories of my past, but I refuse to spend my time deciphering problems back in time. 

We live and grow. Nostalgia will always be my gateway to the past. Nostalgia will always be my gateway to past feelings. Nostalgia will always be.